Yesterday isn't soon enough!

I currently work in an industry where I hear the phrase "I needed this yesterday" more times than I care to remember. More often than not, they say this because of a lack of planning on their part, but they still expect us to jump on command. As if our trucks are sitting in the parking lot waiting on their phone call to make their urgent delivery. Our dispatcher has no qualms in letting them know that a lack of planning on their part does not constitute a state of emergency on his.
We live in a world today where yesterday is simply not soon enough. We want things now and that's it. No waiting. No lines. We have drive-thru at the fast food restaurants. We have high-speed Internet -- on our cell phone because we simply can't wait to get home to use our high-speed Internet there! We have a handy little device called TiVo that enables us to fast forward through commercials (provided we aren't watching live TV) so that we can't rush through the parts we care nothing about to get back to the TV show we do care about. I'm guilty of that. My husband and I will begin a show about fifteen or twenty minutes after it has already started just so we can fast-forward through the commercials. It's actually pretty wonderful.
Go to the grocery store and take your pick of any full-course meal ready to go to your table in thirty minutes or less with little or no prep. It's your way right away. It's how we have to have it. Most grocery stores and Wal-Marts have "speedy checkouts" that enable you to check yourself out so that you have to have absolutely no contact with a sales associate. Just run your items over the scanner and select your method of payment and you're on your way. I do it. I'm not pointing fingers without pointing one at myself first. I like the speedy checkout. Sometimes, I don't want to talk to a sales associate. Sometimes, I just want to get in and get out.
What's my point? My point is that the word "patience" seems to be the hardest word in our vocabulary. It's a word that virtually everyone has a difficult time with. Myself included. I hate waiting. Especially when it's something I really want. Something I feel like I've struggled with for a long time. Something that I feel like I've earned.
I have been trying to get back into teaching for the past couple of years and after two or three disappointing interviews, I find myself waiting, once more, on another teaching position. This time, it's a teaching position that I really desire. I felt the Lord's pull the moment I walked through the door of the school when I interviewed and I really felt a peace when I spoke with the Headmaster and the Department Chair. I have been waiting for a few weeks and now, when it's down to it's final week of waiting, I've grown more and more impatient. I've waited and waited and I'm sick of waiting. I want to know something and there is nothing I can do about it. I can't call them up and say, "I demand to know. Tell me."
Sometimes I feel that God enjoys testing my patience. I think He strives to push and push and force me to rely on Him. In some ways, I should rejoice in that and take courage in the fact that He is in control. In other ways, my flesh takes over and I begin to have doubts. Doubts in my abilities and doubts in my future. I have a very active imagination and Satan enjoys playing with my head.
I honestly think that part of the reason why I have been so cranky and irritable lately is because of the waiting. I hate waiting. I get scared and when I get scared, I get cranky. It's a vicious cycle. One that I haven't learned to break. I should know something next week. Until then, all I can do is wait -- and pray -- and lean on God. He's the only who's in control and I really wouldn't have it any other way.